Wednesday, August 26, 2015

"Withdrawl"

 
 

Well Reader, I thought I burned out my wreath projects last year and I found myself looking at different color schemes and I had to grab my Piggy and Dirt (etsy) Safron Star and with some inspiration from the bright colors of India I bring you this........
The movie 'Frozen' mixed with India seasonings.
 
Underneath is some Christmas wreath that may or may not come back.
Every so often I have to remind myself I am on prednisone and coming off it.
 
Which means withdrawl.
 
Purposely spelled wrong because you kinda get sick of the whole withdrawal scene and just sort of mumble it out like a cowboy who grew up with only 'an 3rd grad educashun.'
 
But seriously, it has been like a marathon or something. Those overnighters they run and take turns with their team. Except it that lasts a week.
I thought I would get used to this dose. The first few days on it are hard and then it levels out when tapering.

Prednisone Taking Readers, once on it long term and then going under ten mgs- this doesn't happen. In fact, it gets worse. Your body is not used to it staying low and having to be productive.
 
So
some new crafts are being made and I'm finding myself watching MASH again and trying to find ways to feel important.
 

(or at least find a fab color scheme and put it into action. I'm glad others make it up and I can just copy.
The above colors make me want to pull out my peach quilt and take a scary dive into that
hot pink color.
 
 
Now that I am done watching the MASH series- I didn't want a run on them while I was in the middle of them so I never mentioned the funny parts that J. and I would watch. - sorry I was selfish and wanted the library to cater to me.
 I
(Love this palette for fall. Piggy and Dirt can make stars in these shades. It just makes me feel the crunching of leaves- they are turning colors here already.

hello winter at night/And  summer in the day!
Love you, Idaho!

I don't have to worry about saying good-bye to a bunch of flowers this year. Not planting them or the garden brought me the needed relief as I tapered prednisone and dealt with an esophagus that was closing off....  *twice we have had it dilated. Thank you to the P.A. that finally found it on an
X-Ray.
 
Being unable is not what it's cracked out to be. J. has seen me sit in my Lazy- Girl Recliner and commented on wishing he could do it all day.
And I have found myself watching others doing various jobs with a great deal of wonder- how do they get there each day and put out the needed energy for such a job or the mental energy?

My sleep schedule is really wacked and I have to sit in the chair to deal with this
stricture.
and the "drawl."


(this is me when I was in 6 grade and I slept like a baby on a normal schedule. )

So here is where I talk about dinero.

Being a writer is a really discouraging profession. Once, three years after I'd sent a children's book to a publishing company, I got a form letter from them.
 
I had totally gone on with my life- like one would do with a crush in elementary.

Then boo-yah!
(this orchid or lavender is really looking cool to me. with the gold.  and royal blue. nice.)
 
There the letter is and you get a little excited...... maybe there is a chance..... you open the letter rick shod- ish -ly (I made that word up for the action you would use when getting "the letter" and there it

is:
 
uh-uh.

 You are denied.

Rejected by a computer that sent out someone's signature.
It really ruins your day. Makes you want to write that computer and tell it what for.

So, Readers, That's why I blog!
Ta-da!

 I can delete any rejection and write whatever I want.
 
I am my own boss. I set my own hours. And get practice writing for ":real" which has panned out only a couple articles because I am too tired to track down the magazines. This is the magazine, people.

one of my diamond stars. not real diamonds so don't break in my house thinking that I am packing around diamonds.

 It's refreshing when I come here, to update my blog, With a sigh of relief I let my finger unfold the daily grind a stay-at-home daughter faced. It is like sliding into home plate and not getting struck out.
 
 I don't charge a dime or get a dime.
(Maybe it isn't worth a dime. How can I make it better?
hmmm.....
I have kept this an ad free blog for a reason.
 
However, Readers, any donations sent to my PO Box to support me with my unique costs, would be awesome.
 
Readers, I want to earn money; I want to get paid. Why?
It makes you feel good. The feeling of being able to put in a good, hard day's work and then lay down at nigh,  knowing  you did your best, is a feeling you can't replace.

Many may think- hey one day she can't walk and then she is walking.
With this disease and or diseases, it can happen.
This confuses people especially family members. Or Jaden.

We vacation by proxy.

"What ??we have to leave? We just got HERE!" is a typical comment until I just eventually became able to see if I went I would run out of gas at about a certain point and may even need a bathroom and so we have not done things in the normal ways families do it.

For instance, I can't camp at this point and so we text each other or phone if he has Padre's  phone and it has service.

  Yes, I can think. I use pillows to help my hands up to this laptop and I have injuries, have a chronic yappy "drawl" from the :withdrawal" and other difficulties.
 
So I  put up random, amateur pictures to this blog that is a letter to anyone who wishes to be the recipient.

I don't even instagram!
 
If we were to compare my post to the quick, easy picture of someone who is very successful simply by taking pictures of their life- my posts would be a gram that was delivered by a meandering, thoughtful donkey.
 
Plodding along, my posts come to you, or you come to them and that's that.

 Most importantly how can I keep from being bored and or frightened by becoming unable?
 
That is the hard part. Which is why I hope J wins the lottery.
We don't even play, so his chances are slim.
 
* I am liking this color combo, Readers. The light fixtures are great next to that dark teal.

Dark Teal and that advocado green.

Wouldn't it be great to be like Mike- Michael Jordan that is, and get paid to do what you love? In an interview once he said he wakes up excited to start the day. As I talked to J. about this and how that involved running his buns off at 5 a.m. and then practice after school. J. said:

"Yeh, he didn't mind all that running because he had a passion for basketball."

Good point. Finding your passion and doing it, whether it was for pay or for play, is something that bring about enjoyment. We agreed on that.

Howver, it would feel great if all the journals I'd written and boyfriends I'd had,cried over and wrote about finally paid off in the form of a pay check.

This is an experiment readers. My head hurts.

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