When darkness falls,
FebRuary was my birthday month!
Hence all the stars.
(This is not a real diamond, thieves. Nothing to break in and steal here, please.)
And I tried to read or listen to what I loved to the best of my ability.
Noelle Smith's bio: Focused
Ghost Boy: bio of Martin Pistorius (not the murderer athlete but the young boy who fell into a coma,
awoke, spent 9 years inside his body unable to communicate a single word.
Or let them know he had better brain capacity than a two year old, like his doctors diagnosed.
Listen to good music- a few months ago J. and I were on some errand, he turned on the random radio young kids listen to and I enjoyed some songs. Others were, meh. And others I had to have him turn it because it was annoying.
"I feel smarter when I listen to music like the CDs I have." I told him. I was referring to some that are of the more calming variety. Usually they help me on dark nights as well. But I decided that that's what we would spend most of our time listening to.
Good music, and the right volume, helps me keep my mind "open". It can describe my feelings when words can't. After a great experience/few hours with Jaden I was very happy but suffering.
When J. asked how I like it and if I had fun he was confused by my answer. - he was confused that I said I was happy but that I was tense. Literally. I couldn't walk really.
A section of a song explained it. J. IS musically inclined. So when I showed him with the song he said" "Ohhhhh!", as if quantum physics just clicked in his brain.
Some things happened (see past posts) that made it hard to read, blog, write my letters, return texts, or even move. kinda bummed out!
However, I feel pretty lucky. And not just because I have Kurt's little cutie Shamrock:
Miracles took place this month too. The biggest one was feeling and the possiblity of those
When you are in the "thick" of things it's hard to feel them, other times you can't help but know they are guiding you. Because I am not that smart and for me to do or get an idea and find something- I give props to the Angels.
in the mid-day
bright and early.
Or your mom reminds you of them and you stop, look back on some events, and have to agree; angels are there.
Kurt's star entitled: "My Mother's Star" in memory of his mother.
As a result of doing those things and keeping in mind that others are there helping, I had some moments where I felt calm. And at peace. Content.
It was last month that I was able to get some journaling done and that felt good and important. Better than a picture or video. But it has to be written with words like Martin Pistorius uses- he should be a thesaurus. Listening to him speak via the help of his synthesizer computer I just am entranced at his vocabulary. Each word seems painstaingly weighed and measured- but he can do it in the blink of an eye. So it's like hearing a sunset- so many colors and flavors from his words! The angels must have been giving him spelling tests each week when he was in his four year coma. (where he had nothing but blackness and no recollection of anything happening yet he knew about the world, that he had a mother (just didn't know she was his until it became clear as they talked about him, around, him but he felt like right through him."
The greatest joy I felt this month was when I showed my grandmother, who is suffering from Parkinson's Disease and a slew of other things that would bring one to their knees. (Like your shoulder bone having died... things of that sort)
She lit up. I had an ipad so I could pull up the pictures of them to a size that she could see. And shoe LOVED the bright ones.
She was so excited!
It was pure delight. And then yesterday I took over his Raspberry little cutie and oh, boy.
Well, she used to make it and we'd have it with homemade bread at her house......
To see her DELIGHT was so gratifying to me. More than anything. I showed her some others I have and she loved them- I had to leave them there. After I put them up with those Command Clear hooks.
Of course we had to have the gal that helps her clean her windows off first, because she loves her windows clean and sparkling and then they were ready for the stars!
I ordered her the one she picked loved after looking at my ipad in its bulky, homemade case that is wrapped in bright yellow duct tape. (It's easier to hold if you have arthritis. )
But the photo taken made her think it was two tone by the way the light hit it. So I ordered another.
I better check Kurt's return policy... ha, ha. Or I'll be adding it to my collection. No biggie.
He and Becky are in the midst of moving! Yay for them! I can't wait to see what his grays, blacks, whites and the back yard look like!!! Especially amongst his wood carving art, stars, landscaping abilities and flowers.
Becky wrote me and told me in detail what plants are going in (their son is a horticulturist and I'm a past city flower girl so, basically same thing. Ha! Yeah right! But I do love flowers!!!!)
It came, her bday isn't for awhile
I was listening to music I liked. Writing and thinking while writing in my journal and journaling for Jaden about his past ski trips. Then I couldn't write. So I just thought about them and figured I'd journal in heaven since we have eternity, or is that how it works?
I have decided the only reason I am on the earth at this time was because I might have been helping pick out the floral arrangements for meadows, etc. and it took me forever to get the right color scheme.
okay, I can't blog anymore it is exhausting and adding pictures is exhausting. So I will post this now.
And that is why we have Leap Year, folks. I needed an extra four years to get things ready for a bday.