Friday, October 3, 2014

Spiders!!!!!!!!! and something else Scary!

I am really glad that one of my readers is not geriatric! Which means I need to keep things fun on here.

So I will share with ya all a letter that I need to write to one of them.

dear Alexis,

Hi! I am so glad you are reading my blog! That makes me happy. Lately I have been way too serious. So I will tell you about what happened last night when I went into my office. I mean to the bathroom.
Because it is fall here and we recieved a lot of rain, the spiders have wanted to move in to a cozier place; inside our house.

Remember that cute little song about spiders going down and then climbing back up some water spout? Little babies think it's fun cause they have NO CLUE  what a spider can do! Yes, most fairy tale rymnes, etc. actually have frightening origins.

Back to when I casually went into our bathroom that I have had on high alert clean since flu season started back on the 1st day of school.

I walked into our orange floored bathroom and passed a bucket I have that says: "Laundry Only"
so that someone doesn't try to use it for a mop bucket. I like to soak hard to get out stains and that is the bucket!

My eye caught something in it that WAS NOT laundry. Unless the spider was cleaning something very tiny. Yes, a spider. There in my clean laundry bucket was a spider! Not a Daddy long leg but a spider with striped nylons on his legs. And a huge back side that was probably full of a million of its babies.


J. came to the door and asked:
"Are you okay?"

ME: "No!!!! There is a Spider in here! Quick go get the Spider Be Gone can !"

So he did. But he had to wait while I hurried up in the office, washed my hands and opened the door.

J: Where is it ?

ME: Swimming in the bucket!
(I had time to put the bucket in the shower and try to drown him. Found out they just swim after playing dead.)

Finally I opened the door, grabbed the can and some gloves and sprayed his swimming pool with toxic pesticide. kidding. It can be used inside as long as you clean the things it touches with clorox or something. And don't prepare food around it.

That wasn't enough for us. If this was a hobo- he needed more torture. So I threw toilet paper over him to trap him even more. Still not enough. J. put gloves on and we walked outside and decided his fate would be in the middle of the road. We dumped out the water and then had to find him with the help of a twig underneath the soggy T.P.

There he was..... This time J. sprayed. We had to stop killing him when the neighbors across the street needed to pull their car out of their driveway and run a late errand.

I hope he's dead and doesn't want revenge.

Another pest this time of year comes from bringing in things like tomatoes from the garden.

Fruit flies.
Those tiny things have the nerve to be small enough to fly through the screen door. We must need a finer mesh....

Anyway, the little pest have suffered electrocusion by tennis raquet! Actually it is a modern day fly swatter. In the shape of a tennis raquet. Cool, huh? We have two. After doing some intense research I learned that they can have a family in 8 days. What father let's their daughter get married and start a family that fast? Fruit Fly Fathers.

Yup, in 8 days they go from baby to parent. That glob of jelly that fell off your toast can be their delivery room. ugh! Your drain- another hospital with little more than midwives to help the tiny, annoying things into this world and then they just hover over your meal.

They can smell fruit from OUTSIDE your house!

or your tomatoes brought into the garage to save from the frost!

Last night we took out all the garbages and today J. is assigned to clean them all out. And mow. And some other stuff. I don't think he knows this yet. I better tell him. Okay, so we got all the pop cans outta here - They apparently love Coca Cola. Even when you rinse them out there are little droplets of pop that can be where they lay their eggs!!!!!!!!

So every time we sit down to dinner Madre and me grab our tennis raquets.

She is really good. You have to be very slow; no sudden movements. The raquet is a small electricution chair for the fruit fly.
J. found out that the arc can give your finger a nice jolt too. So be careful!
Below is a picture of a Fruit Fly on Death Row.....

Another way to eliminate the things is to set out vinegar traps.


Speaking of traps... I better get to Wal-mart and buy some more Sticky traps for those spiders. I wrote about another spider that is really small and annoying and they like to just put a see through sac of their babies on your cieling. To get rid of those ya have to vacuum behind frames and also the ceiling.

How do they expect me to clean, do laundry, sanitize football gear while wearing an Ebola outfit? Do you know how hard it is to find one in my size? And that flatters my figure?

Hope you are having a fun vacation!

your blogging pen pal,

No comments:

Post a Comment

Blog Archive