Friday, January 18, 2013

Good Morning Gil!




Is there some Disney movie/cartoon where it shows a child waking up when he is told and interacting sweetly with his mother/father/caregiver/orphanage director?

Because I have some strange dillusion that J. will behave hypothetically like this:

Me, up and ready for the day wearing a dress and cute 50's apron, tiny waist and singin while I put scrambled eggs in front of a little boy. The little boy is in a plad button upped shirt and his hair is already combed, his face is washed and there is a twinkle in his eye as he thanks me for breakfast.

Child:" Mom, thanks. You're the best.. I'm glad I woke up on time that I have enough time to eat breakfast with you and talk about how much we love eachother!"

Mother: Oh, Sweetie. That's the nicest thing I've heard. Beside you memorizing your multiplication table faster and faster each day!!

Reality:

Me: Jadennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!! Gettttttt UUUUUUUUPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!

J:

Me: JADEN H.D. GET UP.

J: OKAY! (Said as if he is the one on prednisone.)

Me: (state time)

J:

Me: (state a later time than previous.)

Child finally emerges from bat cave with hair cowlecks everywhere.

Me: Good Morning Gil! (Off what about Bob)

J:

Me: I said Goood Morning, Gil!! (purposely sarcastically)

J:

Sits up to table where food sits and does nothing but stare off into space. Time ticks. Mother reminds him to eat and walks from room to do something.

J: .... says something that makes me skip one and two strikes and straight to the clencher.

ME: STTTTTTTTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIKKKKKKKKKKKEEEE!  You are OUT!

I say in upmpire fashion.

Child continues. Mother stays firm. Child leaves. Mother feels guilty and sad.

And now mad to.

Child will climb onto bus without a second thought and by the time he barrels through the door after school will have completly suffered amnesia as to his behaviour and why he won't be able to play.

boo hoo. Becaue I really wanted him to be able to play. And his consequence is basically a death sentence to me cause that will mean we get to hang out together while he is still in a chirpy mood.

I can't wait.

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