Tuesday, November 23, 2010


There is nothing like being blindsided by the opposite sex. When this time of year rolls around, I get the jitters.

To top it off, every Christmas we get to listen to George Michael and the rest of WHAM, remind us about it in their song: 'Last Christmas'.

One minute we are wearing bright, colored clothing from:

-located at our own, brand new Grand Teton Mall, and suddenly the trendy store isn't able to keep up in this rural town, is replaced by Jay Jacobs, and George Michael is NOT Bringing Sexy Back to us Girls.

Thankfully, we could at least try to keep up with European fashion but getting over the latter would be A LOT harder. I am not speaking for other women, just those of us from rural Idaho.

While cautiously navigating holiday traffic, the synthesized bells coming over the radio are a traditional reminder of being jilted, by Michael, all those years ago.

I had to pull up the "Official Video" for 'Last Christmas' to see how in the world he pulled the wool over my eyes. ( Idaho never got those videos or I never watched them, til recently. Those short, shorts in Jitter Bug were a dead give away.)

In the Christmas video, the girl (wearing the same permed, bell cut I religiously wore through Jr. High and the first two weeks of HS) he'd given his heart to 'last year', was now prancing around in the snow, looking happy as punch in her Kool-Aid coat with the other guy from WHAM.

Michael, in fashionable revenge, brings a new girl 'this year', to Saas Fee, Switzerland for the annual cozy cabin Christmas break. Poor George finds his fellow feather-haired band member wearing the diamond floral broach he'd given bell girl the previous Christmas.

Did she give Rigley the broach the very next day or did Mike really give it to him in the first place and pretended to give Belle his heart?

Dear Michael,

It's bitter-sweet to hear your voice melt over the air waves when the weather is freezing, my breath is forming clouds in the car; raw, Idaho wind blasting the car off the highway, and to top it off, Christmas is on its way.

All those memories of you, in your videos.... leading me and countless other ignorant/naive girls to believe you were singin' to "us". ?

It's pure torture.

(Nothing like having my Sophomore haircut canonized in the year book year at all.)

How'd I let you fool me in those short, shorts beggin' to be woke up, when you'd already left?

(Your hair looks hot jet black even though you've gone grey. We still like you, either way.)

Christmas is already tough with out this melodic reminder to listen to as I shop, drive to work or pine for love without having to add the fact you opted "out".

Was it the hair, G?

P.S. You always wear hot shades/glasses. Where do you get them? Write Back Soon!


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