Pop's Pop Protocal

I learned a few more things in the last few weeks that made me feel Rosie the Riveter empowered.

The first was due to the tonsillectomy and my searching the internet for relief and ideas on what to do with the situation.

I read that if you drink Coca~Cola, after your tonsils are torn from your throat, it will painfully strip the scabs off, bring immediate relief due to all tonsillectomy woes. (This didn't seem scientifically proven, but I was desperate and resorted to Padre's pop stash)



Don't care for pop, especially the carbonation, thanks to a HS Football coach's warning: it "winds" ya! Under the dire circumstances, two gapping holes in my throat- referring pain to my ears like a Star Trek episode when Khan puts those slimy bugs into the helmets of two Trekkies and the worms wrap around their ear drums or something- I had to do whatever I could to alleviate the Khan-like punishment of excruciating ear and throat pain.

Pain I dare say only those that have felt the guillitine's slice, right before death.

Luckily, they die quickly and you with your recently removed Red Wood rooted tonsils, sit with a blade-like pain in your throat for at three weeks.

Blogger's detour:(Read Great Expectations!!!!!!!! KILLER Guillitine moment interspersed with the gentle heoirc action of a lawyer's mercy, great courage by several charachters, followed by redemption and love. Two love stories to be exact.

One of my favorite books. Expect big words, but don't stop! You will be crying at the end and willing to do whatever for those you love, find hope in overcoming your weaknesses or at least redemption through paying a price... That's it, I'm reading it again. However, I would never want to endure a tonsillectomy again. ever.)

I poured the cup and commenced to hop up and down, grab my throat, flap my arms, while tears and carbonation well in my eyes; Coach was right, I was sufficiently winded.

This dancing around allowed carbonation to escape the bottle- I usually don't care if pop goes stale, but Padre, has to have his fizz. Like in the Olympics, fratctions of seconds matter!!

I drank from the DIET bottle, which he will NOT touch, but still, POP/Padre Protocal must be kept!! I have never learned this maneauver. Maybe out of spite. Or lack of care for pop. But I got a crash course in it. Here it is:

A special, patented cork and a pump keeps beverages "sparkling" and carbonated. It can be used for wine, too. See picture below.




For only 9.99 from Rush's Kitchen Supply, you can buy this most valuable contraption. However, there are only three little soda stoppers per package. Which seems rather exspensive to me.

After Padre quickly pointed out my indiscretion that led to the seconds ticking away AND valuable CARBONATION escaping into the atmospere from the Cola; he told me the importance of the camping like contraption.

Windedly I croaked: "I don't even know where you keep the pop pump!" Tears involuntarily spilled onto the kitchen floor. USE CAUTION! when attempting this during your tonsil tearing!

Thankfully, Madre, a white, calm personality, walked to the cabinet and showed me the pop pump's home; a space next to the spices. To her surprise, It wasn't in its home!

Code RED. Even this calm, collected, veteraned-wife put it into gear.

We rushed to the table and counter tops searching under napkin holders, vases of full of flowers I'd placed on it, mail and junk mail from the last two days..

and there it was, under one of Padre's perfectly creased, ordered from A section to Z section, WSJ.(Wall Street Journal).

Not only do I now know how to change a bike tire, know how to pump it to the appropriate level for the activity (racing, skate parking, or pooped out level of air proximity); but CAN NOW add to my "know how to" list: POP PUMPING.


(Norman Rockwell's version of Rosie)

First you wet the champagne/soda stopper then twist it onto the bottle.

You grab the pump, lift the handle and push H2O back into the bottle, you must lift the pump off the bottle after each pump and continue in like fashion until the bottle looks like it is going to explode.

I don't know about you, but the more skills I learn, the more empowered I feel. It's a very AMERICAN feeling. A woman, like ol Rosie during WW II when the boys were gone, we women could role up our sleeves and get to work riveting. And cutting our skirts shorter to ration the material.

Due to my neighbors, I can also add to my list of how to, How to make Colloidal Silver for the same tonsil problemo. Along with what to do if you have been swallowed up by sugary snow by a tree upon your snowmobile, weld, and a number of other useful or at least interesting things, like juggling rolled up socks.

The confidence in learning how to do any of these things, from pumping air back into your Cola, to starting a fire with nothing but dollar bills from your wallet and two rocks, learning how to do something for yourself is empowering. But don't worry, boys, we still feign we need you because, really, we do. I would much rather have you keep the carbonation in the pop than have to do all that pumping alone.

But don't fret! America is a nation of new "Rosie's".

Bring on the CarboNation!