Dear Anonymous Commentor,

Rather than filter comments from everyone but my invited readers, I decided to allow all comments to come. The good, the bad, the ugly. Thanks to bloggerfordummies.blogspot.com, I am empowered by the fact that I don't need to post any of the comments or even take them personally.

Here is one question I'd like to address, one I would love to answer....

"How do you find time to blog when you're Professional Patient, mother and lack a dishwasher?

Dear Anon. Reader,

Like this:



Those of us fortunate to be stuck in the stone age of dish washing, have a great advantage to those with dishwashers: free therapy. I have said before, and will re-iterate, hand washing is much like yoga- for the brain.

It also builds your creaitivy. The air conditioner above the window blocks my kitchen garden view, and requires me to make up a view in my head. This imagination lends itself to what writers need most: material.



Many a devised sentence has taken place with the help of scalding hot water-logged hands, fingernails floppy enough to not break once bent backward, a hand made wash rag looped around the tines of a fork; slowly cleaning them.


But seriously,Anon, I will answer 'how' one can have an auto-immune disease, be a professional patient, and still accomplish a few things.... oh, and how to get genuine, sincere compliments like: "Well, ya look good!"

(PS thank you for those compliments, It's nice to hear you look good when your body is waging war against itself on the inside. I appreciate the fact I have been blessed with hand-me-down looks from my parents, even if they came with a mutated gene that has caused chaos inside my body. It is nice to look good. I just know that I can look a lot different at points and I brace myself for the inevitable unrecognition)


So here is the list, Anonymous. The top "10 Ways to How She Does It"

10. Move home with your parents.

If they love you, or at least tolerate you, this will be the best move you make.

It will allow you to focus on being a full-time patient. Only with the help of sibling rivalry and the proximity of your neibors to such performances, will you be spurred to undergo any kind of treatment in an effort to get better.

If you all share a common belief in Judeo-Christianity and its tenets of forgiveness, or are blessed with selective memory; all should smooth over after some time.

9. This is a big one on the beauty factor: one siblings must be a beautician. Having this great geenetic tie has meant I have been the recipient of a professional's salon discounts. The latest, 'ENJOY!' shampoo and conditioner has been nice, and I the mint colored TIGI Manipulator with its yummy coconut smell has been good for keeping my hair in place.) Sis's ceramic hair straightener has been a time saver for sure.

An "IN HOUSE" hair stylist makes primping a lot less painful to your wallet. Especially if she medaled at ISU's Annual Hair show and walked away with First Place in the category: "Best men'short hair stylist". Because she can fade my son's hair. (Now he wants it long. So that doesn't help us anymore.

Warning: you may choose to let your hair be a dummy for practice for beauty school students; NO WORRIES! Hair does grow back! There have to be sacrifices if you are going to get this student trained,so be willing to sacrifice!

8.

Have a child that is overly energetic.

I know most of you will scream that this is genetic... but honestly I think it is simply spending time and teaching them. They learn it, love it, and won't leave you alone once they've mastered it. So be prepared. Having camping skills will help, cause that is what you will end up doing: campin' out. Or "Roughin' it."



Spending all day at the skate park will require food, water, and patience.

Living at home will allows me to use Padre's tools, gadgets and camp equipment, i.e. coolers, extra large thermoses, and camera; if permission is granted.

Which falls under #7.

When I tried to use Padre's dutch ovens to prepare a meal at the Park, the Parks and Recreation folks came unglued about "rules" and such and having a bon fire in the middle of a skate park.
(they should try having to hang out at these place all day)

If city ordinances or health keep you from getting out, threaten the child wth a need of their help weeding the garden or washing the dishes.

Magically, the child will disappear to do old-fashioned play, leaving you with moments of alone time.



6.

Afternoon naps. I call it: Down Time. And it can happen at any point in the day.

Translation: child does whatever he like, as long as he stays inside and is completly mute while letting mom lay down. Ear plugs come in handy for those kids that struggle with the latter part.

Many think "down time" has to do with laziness. Really, it is a life saver. Once, a friend asked: "Don't you get bored, just laying there?" I was in a severe episode with my illness that went on for about 3 years. Laying there on the bed with a heat warmer on my stomache, I thougth about that question and tried to think if I had been bored. I wasn't, not at all.

When all of your cells are attacking one another, it really isn't boring. It requires all of your efforts to allow them time to do their thing. Every ounce of my attention and energy is exerted to allow these cells to do whatever the heck it is they do.

In fact, it is almost a work out. But I can't tell you the calories it burns. All I know is that I never get bored. And the only thing burnin' is the midnight oil.


If that isn't even possible, than the hum of a humidifier and the pleasant memories in your head will entertain your busy body. I have yet to get bored.

5. YOu will have time to read a book, write letters, do needlepoint, cross stitch, or call a friend.

Being bed-ridden can be a real bummer after so long...

But if you challenge yourself, you can learn stuff. Like a new language.

It is only sad when you are unable to write, read, or type while bed-ridden. When all your energy has to focus on NOT thinking because you are expending the energy needed for your white and red blood cells to fight eachother. (J and I imagine them dressed as pirates, donning swords, bandanas and eye patches.)

At those moments I look at a single picture that I like; one kept from a calendar or a card sent to me. I can close my eyes if I get tired and, when I have enough strength, look at it again. Old calendars are nice for this exercise. And so are lots of memories and books under your belt. You draw from those when you can't do anything. Like the movie: Count of Monte Christo. He's in a rock cell where he gets to meditate for several years.

If he had an auto-immune disease, he might not have learned to sword fight.

4. Friends. The more you serve others the better you feel. And vice-versa. They are there when you need them the most. All I have to do is make a call, and boom, they are there.

3. Going from poor to poo(where you are so poor you can't help but pronounce the word like a little boy with a speech impediment and can't prounounce the 'r's.) is quite liberating. You realize what are needs and wants. Not that you don't want some things, you just realize that using plain 'ol soap on your face rather than your exspensive facial system, isn't the end of the world. And you can't tell the difference. Except when you can't get the lotion. That is one thing I will hold to. But if it's tight- vaseline will do the trick and a yellow, generic tub of that will last longer than most marriages.

2. Waiting in Dr. Offices. I can't tell you how many hours I have sat in a waiting room to get health care. It is a great opportunity to read, learn patience or deep breathing techniques. If you are prepared with a pen and paper, you could use that time to write a book, or two. Or at least log you life down for your posterity, so they know you weren't just killing time looking at People magazine or flipping through the channels of cable TV, while your mind slowly rots.

And the number 1 reason I am able to do it:

A team of Doctors, Researchers, and all the professional patients that went before, blazing a trail, so I can navigate this crazy disease, its treatment and the side effects that go along with it. Mixed with my parents and friends. That's how I do it.

I hope this anwers your question, Anon.