Polite Goat Suckers

Thanks to the History channel, J learned about this odd, ugly hybrid animal believed to be in the Mexican, Puerto Rican area with a name that is spanish - chucacabras- which means to literally suck blood. (livestock blood) Thanks to Google I found it is in more places than those sites. Which means it could also suck the blood of a live, stock holding human person. It doesn't discriminate.

In the History channel clip they called them goat suckers. As you can imagine this was heavily on a young boy's mind, especially in the depths of the basement. Morning came, I was in the bathroom, readying for the day, and he beat up the stairs in record time only to be barred from me by a bathroom door. So he did what any kid would do, told me ALLLL about it as he shifted from foot to foot, kindly waiting until I was finished, an hour later, to use the bathroom. (one is downstairs but you never know if sightings of Goat suckers have been made in basements, yet. wise move)

Animatedly, he shared for a good hour about this strange and grotesque creature; How the "K-9" (he thought that was its official name, not comprehending the uncertainty of scientists as to whether it belonged to that family) drags unsuspecting Texas and Puerto Rican cats, dogs, humans from their kitty litter, Dog kennels and computers to kill them.

"They sound ruthless." I casually called out from the tub as the water gushed into the porcelain sanctuary.

"Nah, their not rude, just mean." he clarified.

"Oh, that's good." I had to admit as I turned off the water. Because if something ugly and rude is going to suck your blood, I'd prefer the Edwardian etiquette.a polite one would be better than a rude one if he were to suck my blood. Unfortunately for the beast, no one is in line to play this ugly mutt in a Sci-Fi movie. In fact, they are so horrifying to look at, I can't bare to put its mug on my pretty blog.

What I will do is tell you it is a hairless cross between Golom; but with worse posture, a Greyhound, and it stole its T-Rex head from a museum. However, some photos make it look like an innocent possum- faced creature that can't help that he has Rexy's dentures.

Yeah, right.

This grotesque combination of a creature knew EXACTLY what he was doin' when mating and the fact it added a kangaroo ( to get the longer back legs; so as to stand up and look you right in the eye or down on you, depending on your heigth,) to its coyote, dog,T-Rex DNA mutation; without our knowledge, is down right despicable!

That politician-type underhanded, chucka-caw-brat doesn't have my vote.

His slick, icky skin helps him glide perfectly into every kid and parent's nightmares and other places that sure as heck better get them extinct, or else.

I want the UN in on this. Or the drug lords. Whoever, has the better weaponry.

I don't know what I am gonna do, but if I am in Texas, I am packin' a pistol, missile, tazor, bazooka, WHATEVER NECESSARY, AND THE MAN TO CARRY IT AND ME.

Sorry, Mexico, and any of you other Latin America countries; I wanted to visit you, but your livestock sucking beast sealed the "not in a zillion years, deal."

Dora the Explorer is the closest I am coming to checking out the beauties of the Latin America. Unless Dora and her map can convince goat sucker, no sucking I am not stepping foot over there with out some serious Tony Stark and his Iron outfit AND Whiplash's.